1. What did Miss Muffett sit on? – the buffet after slipping on a dropped vol au vent (with no rats in it).
2. Who tried to gatecrash her dinner? – Boris the spider (not the PM!)
3. What did Wee Willie Winkie do? – Ran all round town in his night gown – his case comes up next week.
4. How many blackbirds were baked in a pie? – As many red herrings as there are in the wood (oops, wrong nursery rhyme!) and no rats, definitely no rats!
5. Who sold sea shells on the sea shore? – It wasn’t me, she did, I saw her (I was chasing rats)!
6. What did Peter Piper pick? – He picked up all the rats his cousin, Pied, missed, for the Pied Pepper Pie Company (no rats).
7. What ran up the clock? – A huge bill on Noddy’s taxi while waiting for Elmer Fudd to catch a wabbit (see below).
8. What was daddy going to wrap Baby Bunting in? – a wabbit skin but he made the mistake of hiring Elmer Fudd, in the end he got a fake fur from Primark.
9. Where did Doctor Foster go? – On a “golfing” holiday with Miss Pain the dentist.
10. What was the old man doing when it was pouring with rain? – 🎶Just dancing and singing…🎵
Thank you for this week’s suggestions pensitivity101